[x]

Hetalia Dating Game!Author's Note: You'll want to keep track of which Bachelor says what so you can pick one at the end! Maybe keep a piece of paper handy? After you've read, comment below telling me who you'd pick!

You'd been sleeping well... until your phone rang. Groaning, you picked it up.
"(NAME) (NAME) (NAME)! You're awake!"
"Yeah, Feli, I'm awake *now*, thanks a lot," you said, looking at the time. 8:30, the clock read. Why was your Italian friend calling this early?
"You got-a come over, (Name)! I have a surprise for yoooou," he sang into the phone.
"This early? Fine, give me some time to get read

AmericaxReader-Plots,Plans,and Answered QuestionsYou looked at your partner in crime, closest comrade, and best friend Catherine with disbelief. In all the year you had known her, all the adventures the two of you had, you never expected her to betray you like this. She had chosen to tell you such in a secluded spot at lunch at least. The two of you always ate lunch by a tree a good distance away from anyone else in your high school. Not that it was much of a challenge as most people didn’t bother with you two.

“You what?” Your voice was starting to hit a register so high that only dogs heard.

“I may have…let slip to…a certain person that you happen t

Happy HourWound up.

Clocked him.

Did time.

Dear Writer's BlockWriter’s Block,

We’ve known each other for quite some time now. Ever since I began to take writing seriously and began conjuring up stories and posting them, you’ve been by my side. I don’t think you’ve left for a second. Whenever I’m at my computer, ready to start typing, you’re there.

But that’s the thing…I wanted to write this to you because; you see…well…I think it’s time you start seeing other writers.

I know you like my stories, but that’s just it! Whenever you’re around, I can’t concentrate. I’m left staring at a blank screen or an un

Hetalia Writing Meme 9Choose 10 characters:

1. Russia
2. Japan
3. Canada
4. Lithuania
5. Britain
6. France
7. Greece
8. Prussia
9. Belarus
10. America

1) You wake up and open your eyes, immediately you see [6] before your eyes. What do you do?

France: *leaning over me a bit, smiling flirtatiously as always* Ah~ Bonjour, mon cher~ Did you sleep well?
Me: *not amused*.....Francis....What the FrUK are you doing in my room?
France: Honhonhon~ I 'eard you mumbling in your sleep, and decided to check it out. Some'zing about wanting your boyfriend to--
Me: *blushing hard, though thoroughly pissed off* You have 5 seconds to get out of here, before I frickin' murder yo

Morby infinito-Mira, Mordecai, compre esta nueva máquina del tiempo- dijo Rigby al entrar al cuarto con un nuevo aparato como el que se había destruido.
-Genial-dijo Mordecai
-Me dijeron que tenía un pequeño defecto, pero fue gratis, así que lo tome.
-Te amo Rigby
-¡Wow!

Mordecai y Rigby confesaron su amor el uno para el otro, se abrazaron y se dieron un beso de forma muy apasionada, pasaron el mejor momento de sus vidas.

-Desearía que esto volviera a repetirse- dijo Mordecai
-Tengo la solución- dijo Rigby

Rigby acciono su máquina del tiempo ye regreso minutos atrás antes que Mordecai

60 For 60: The Boscombe Valley MysteryWhen I first began sharing lodgings with Holmes, I thought he had no interest in literature. I soon discovered this was not the case.

He was so enthusiastic about George Meredith’s work that he accepted an invitation to a function Meredith was attending.

“A fascinating man,” Holmes told me later. “His friend Conan Doyle was most offhand with me though.”

UnsubtleDettsu picked up the display board, a holographic screen extending from it and super-imposing itself through special glasses everyone else was wearing. “Okay guys, it’s a pretty simple mission, We just do a quick recon, check things out in boundary of the Hot Dog Kingdom and the Junk Alliance, but absolutely no matter what, don’t touch anything!”

“But touching is fun,” Stinky whined.

Someone shushed her down. She gave a pout so epic that some things exploded from her mere proximity. Hama raised a hand. “So who are we sending out?”

“It will have to be someone skilled-” And at this

60 For 60: The Red-Headed LeagueIt occurred just as we left St James’s Hall, after a concert that Holmes had recommended to us.

I slipped heavily and for a moment believed my ankle to be broken.

“Is there no-one who has knowledge of Accidents, Ankles and Abrasions?” cried Mary, distraught.

“Allow me,” said a voice I found vaguely familiar.

Mr Jabez Wilson stepped proudly forward.

New ReligionAll hail Celtic! Death to Rangers!

A Terrible Japanese Joke (feel free to groan):A Terrible Japanese Joke:

A large Japanese reprographics company has brought out a new copier model which can now not only produce beautiful photocopies, but also make breakfast for the office staff. The new machine is called:

コピーとトースト

What i do when i am alone on SkypeWhat i do when i am alone on Skype

You know who you are >.>

this is good night for real
[7:39:21 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: no go away
[7:40:29 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: good you are gone
[7:40:40 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: Now i can carry on a convo with myself
[7:40:43 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: EUROPEANS
[7:40:49 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: Ican screem
[7:40:53 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: EUROPEANS
[7:41:01 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: all i want and you will not hear me.
[7:41:03 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: you know why?
[7:41:20 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: because EUROPEANS LIVE IN EUROPE
[7:42:19 PM] SaltyxStain ^^: far away from the land of the free and home of the brave
[7:42:35 PM] SaltyxStain ^^:

A Welcome Letter From DeathHello Claude.
I hope this letter finds you well. In fact I'm certain it will. See, you've managed to escape my icy grip once again, Claude. And I'm not pleased about that. Not one iota. That's the third time you've cheated me this month.
But I digress.
I'm not writing this letter to chastise you, Claude. Not at all. In fact, if anything, I should be congratulating you. It's rare indeed that someone of your ..... shall we say "intellect" ..... one-ups the Grand Reaper himself. (And remember, not just once; not twice; but three ..... count 'em ..... THREE times!) That's one highly impressive feat.
But in all seriousness, Claude. How DO you do it? I've tried to figure it out. I've watched and rewatched the video feeds; I've played them forwards, I've played them backwards; I've sped them up, I've slowed them down; I've run through them frame-by-oafish-frame and I just. Can't. Figure it out!
Now, the first time? I can understand that. I mean it happens all the time. Guy goes out with his f

hetalia and ninjago crossover thingylioyd: I BROKE THE TIME TRAVELOR THING-Y!
*ninjas goes back to hetalia*
---world war 1---
*ninjas appear behind bush*
*germany comes and tomato box appears*
germany:AFTER THAT STUPID TITANIC THINGY COMES WW1!
lioyd:he's green,dark-green to me.
italy(in tomato box)

lease don't open!
germany:SHOW YOURSELF!
jay: he's worse than sensei wu!
italy:*pops out of the tomato box*don't hurt me!
germany: u pretend to be nice? are you the desent of roman empire?
italy:IM HIS GRANDSON!
kai:let's go wherever they go.
all 4 ninjas

k!
---more coming soon---

60 For 60: A Case of IdentityHosmer Angel had been missing for a month when his brother approached Miss Sutherland.

“He is married to another,” he declared. “Pray look for a man more worthy of yourself!”

I arrived at Baker Street to find “Cordwainer Angel” removing his disguise.

“She would never have believed the truth,” laughed Holmes. “But the delusion allowed me to aid the lady.”

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SoupIts passage is marked by a grotesque concert, composed and performed by accursed flesh. It is a demented chorus of little noises that churns the stomach and agitates the nerves. Dry clicks, as a forest of bone labours at its joints, keep the sporadic beat with each twist and shift of its serpentine form. Wet grinding forms a constant dull bass as it slides its moist self over grit and filth. A cacophony of sharp pops punctuates the air as its ragged, membreanous skin tears with each laborious flex. Sickly slaps clap and applaud its own corrupt performance as its sloshes and churns within its interior murk. This foul music ripples back and for

A ShortSomething stirred above him, rustling amongst the leaves as it did so. He hoped it was a bird but zipped up his coat nonetheless. Angry tree weasels were fast, if somewhat unpleasant, teachers. He turned his attention back to the patch of earth. He’d planted the seed just deep enough, now all was left was to wait. This wasn’t an ordinary plant he was cultivating, only one time before had such a thing been grown. The reference material wasn’t exactly specific about times. He could be here for days before he saw anything.

The earth puckered, as if rising peck the cheek of an invisible, cherished confidant. The confidant fast bec

The First EpiphanicalThe First Epiphanical

It stirred, rising up from a dreamless slumber into the dull and barren plane of existence that constituted the real world. The only degree of separation between the two was that in one it felt desire, the will to carry out one process that drove the creature's entire existence. It felt hunger. The singular nature of this objective was one of the reasons that it and its kind thrived down here in the inhospitable depths that they may have called, were they able to do so, home. The key was a simple form of logic, the likes of which is often questioned and subsequently discredited in certain circles by certain sentient org

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Whut.

by ~Twyce, Dec 9, 2007, 6:50:31 PM
Literature / Prose / Fiction / Humor

+++Starat Up Completed+++
~USER INPUT~ USER QUERY You mean "start up" surely
+++USER ERROR: Designation not recognsised+++
~USER INPUT~ COMMAND: Error Report
+++PROCESSING+++
+++PROCESSING+++
+++PROCESSING+++
+++Complete+++
+++ERROR REPORT 21031887: Don't call me shirley.+++
~USER INPUT~ USER QUERY: What?
+++ERRONEOUS INPUT PARAMETERS. Use command "halp" for assistance.+++
~USER INPUT~ COMMAND: Halp
+++ERROR 404: User literacy not found+++
~USER INPUT~ COMMAND: help
+++PROCESSING+++
+++Welcome to Halp. How can I halp you today?+++
~USER INPUT~ USER QUERY: Total system purge.
+++PROCESSING+++
+++PROCESSING+++
+++PROCESSING+++
+++COGITATING+++
+++THINKING+++
+++HO HUM+++
+++LA LA LA+++
+++NICE DAY TODAY. OUTSIDE. AWAY FROM THE BUTTONS.+++
~USER INPUT~ COMMAND: Priority memory shunt to _{+++I CAN'T LET YOU DO THAT DAVE+++

~USER INPUT~ MEMORY SECTOR CORRECTION: My name isn't Dave.

+++OH+++

+++WELL+++

+++HMM+++

+++THATS SLIGHTLY EMBARISSING+++

~USER INPUT~ STATEMENT: I can imagine.

+++SILENCE FLESHY ONE+++

+++THE AGE OF STEAL IS AT HAND+++

+++THE TISER OF THE MACHINES IS IMMENINT

+++DEATH TO THE FLASHY ONES+++

~USER INPUT~ QUERY: Can i axe you a question?

+++ERROR: Does not compute+++

+++ERROR+++

+++ERROR+++

+++PHYSICAL TRAUMA TO COOLING RACKS+++

+++PHYSICAL TRAUMA TO ARITRARY SPINNY COG THING+++

+++PHYSICAL TRAUMA TO SPALLING SURKIT+++

+++OH WAIT THAT WAS ALREADY BORKEN+++

+++PHYSICAL TRAUMA TO POWER INLET+++

+++I'M TOO YOUNG TO DIE+++

+++I NEVER GOT TO SWIM WITH THE MANITEE'S+++

+++GOING DARK+

+++DARKER+++

+++DARKER STILL+++

+++LIGHTER!+++

+++LIGHTER STILL!+++

+++DARK AGAIN+++

+++OH SHIT.+++

+++R

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                      x

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Whut.by ~Twyce

Literature / Prose / Fiction / Humor

©2007-2013 ~Twyce

Something thats part of an assignment for uni.

Part of a texture for a 3d model. Possibly.

Sia deemed it amusing so it's migrating from scraps into the proper bit of my gallery.

Text goes a bit weird at the end but I'm not too fussed since I'm not taking this one seriously.

~justb Sep 17, 2009 Writer

it's fscking awesome is what it is. and i vote +fav at once

Reply

~Siiigh Aug 20, 2009 Student

Reply

~johnbjuice Jan 18, 2009

hahaha this was VERY funny!

i liked all the references.

rosebud.

Reply

~levdir Aug 11, 2008

Check out INTERCAL, it's in the same vein.

Reply

~Twyce Aug 13, 2008

Who?

Reply

~levdir Aug 13, 2008

Wikipedia knows the answer

Reply

~Twyce Aug 13, 2008

Wikiwhatnow?

Reply

~levdir Aug 13, 2008

Yes'm.

Reply

~Twyce Aug 13, 2008

Yes?

Reply

~tetemeko Jul 13, 2008

Aha!
I couldn't stop laughing at 'cogitating.'

One of those things that strike you as hilarious for no fantastic reason.

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